I do read what I write - and I'm fully aware that it seems that all I do is bitch about my life. The fact is: my life is pretty good - and the ONLY things I have to complain about are small things. Yes I realize that I just ADMITTED that they are 'small' but when they occur over and over again - they become bigger annoying things. Anyway - bitching about my amount of bitching isn't any sort of incentive to make me NOT bitch on my blog. Its my blog, after all isn't it?
Last night I went through a lot of trouble to make shrimp alfredo, garlic cheese biscuits (like the ones from Red Lobster) served with a nice Australian shiraz (that's wine). I had to yell at Keith 4 times to get him to come sit down in the kitchen at the table ... by then the shrimp alfredo was already barely above warm .. at any rate I gave Keith more food than me thinking that if I didn't that he'd tear through it and would get up and go back to filming straight away.
What was I hoping for? Hours later after sleeping I can't say for sure. I can say that I was hoping for maybe a little romance. Lately it feels like I go out of my way to do cute and romantic things just to get an "Awww thanks!" then he skips away like I have cooties on the playground. My friend (of like 13 years) Stef says "Oh that just happens over time. Its called being married. Once you're married for so long ya don't really care about those things, and the other person isn't so much the center of your universe anymore ... its getting comfortable." Well I hate it! I don't want to be comfortable!
I'm glad that winter is coming on here in England - all these skinny pretty girls will be hiding themselves in coats and I won't feel so bloaty :D Hahah bitches! That was mean :( But its true!
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Friday, September 21, 2007
YouTube Celebrities are crap
So I'm really getting over saturated with the lack of fun that I used to find on YouTube. Seems these days its either people uploading content that isn't theirs - or its middle aged balding men complaining about how other people are more popular than they are on the YouTube. SHUT UP! One guy claims to have a full time job for a Fortune 500 company .. yet all he does is bitch and moan about how he wants to do videos for a living. With WHAT talent?! Keep your day job dude.
At any rate - Keith and I have been talking for a year or so now about starting a vlog to accompany our site and blog. Its mostly a 'meet the directors' type of thing and not so much a "Look what we can do" type of thing. There was a point in time that we both kinda hid behind our avatars. Sure we were never afraid to BE ourselves - but there was a time we were worried about SHOWING ourselves. And by us I mean me. I'll just cut to the chase by saying that I feel unattractive and felt that the general public would put more emphasis on my outward apperance rather than my talents and whatever ... but at this point I don't care.
Maybe watching all those middle aged balding men whining and crying about their wishes has brought a new sense of 'me' around. They don't seem to care that they should spend their spare time with their kids instead of making videos -- and the general public on YouTube doesn't seem to make a single comment to that degree so why so I even worry about anyone thinking I'm fat?! PFFT. Bring it, bitches. Seriously.
On a fat note - I do plan to start working out this winter once Keith and I are able to actually put a schedule together. I realize that his work schedule changes at the drop of a hat - but he'll just have to fork out a few extra bucks a week on gas in order to let me get out more. The past couple weeks I have been going out on Saturday or Sunday for a couple hours while he works on videos .. but that's really lame. I should be able to go wherever I want whenever I want to do it. I honestly don't think that a couple bucks in gas money is a lot to spend considering the benefits from it.
He and I got into a little bit of an argument a few weeks back about how regardless of how bad of a tourist I am ... I want to NOT be in the house all the time. He gets to go to work and come home - whereas for me work IS home so its like I'm always at work. He saw my point, but said something to the effect of a waste of gas blah blah blah ... at any rate he's just going to have to stop keeping such a leash on me as far as who's allowed to spend money and who isn't. I always feel like I'm not allowed to buy anything or spend money - but he can do whatever he wants cuz its 'his' money.
Its almost 6:30pm and I'm heating up some water to wash dishes. Once he comes home this weekend ... he'll be working on that video probably non stop again. Oh joy oh rapture! I have a wedding scheduled for Sunday so he'll have to at least take a break for a couple hours while I film and edit that .... and we are in desperate need of groceries. We needed groceries LAST week but I couldn't tear him away from filming and editing in order to get that done. Maybe I'll just do it myself this weekend. We'll see!
At any rate - Keith and I have been talking for a year or so now about starting a vlog to accompany our site and blog. Its mostly a 'meet the directors' type of thing and not so much a "Look what we can do" type of thing. There was a point in time that we both kinda hid behind our avatars. Sure we were never afraid to BE ourselves - but there was a time we were worried about SHOWING ourselves. And by us I mean me. I'll just cut to the chase by saying that I feel unattractive and felt that the general public would put more emphasis on my outward apperance rather than my talents and whatever ... but at this point I don't care.
Maybe watching all those middle aged balding men whining and crying about their wishes has brought a new sense of 'me' around. They don't seem to care that they should spend their spare time with their kids instead of making videos -- and the general public on YouTube doesn't seem to make a single comment to that degree so why so I even worry about anyone thinking I'm fat?! PFFT. Bring it, bitches. Seriously.
On a fat note - I do plan to start working out this winter once Keith and I are able to actually put a schedule together. I realize that his work schedule changes at the drop of a hat - but he'll just have to fork out a few extra bucks a week on gas in order to let me get out more. The past couple weeks I have been going out on Saturday or Sunday for a couple hours while he works on videos .. but that's really lame. I should be able to go wherever I want whenever I want to do it. I honestly don't think that a couple bucks in gas money is a lot to spend considering the benefits from it.
He and I got into a little bit of an argument a few weeks back about how regardless of how bad of a tourist I am ... I want to NOT be in the house all the time. He gets to go to work and come home - whereas for me work IS home so its like I'm always at work. He saw my point, but said something to the effect of a waste of gas blah blah blah ... at any rate he's just going to have to stop keeping such a leash on me as far as who's allowed to spend money and who isn't. I always feel like I'm not allowed to buy anything or spend money - but he can do whatever he wants cuz its 'his' money.
Its almost 6:30pm and I'm heating up some water to wash dishes. Once he comes home this weekend ... he'll be working on that video probably non stop again. Oh joy oh rapture! I have a wedding scheduled for Sunday so he'll have to at least take a break for a couple hours while I film and edit that .... and we are in desperate need of groceries. We needed groceries LAST week but I couldn't tear him away from filming and editing in order to get that done. Maybe I'll just do it myself this weekend. We'll see!
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Titles are for weenies
While traipsing around YouTube I found an easter egg!
30 MINUTES OF 80s CARTOON INTROS!
So awesome.
30 MINUTES OF 80s CARTOON INTROS!
So awesome.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
I am sooo not 'with' it
So this nerd test thing has been circling the blogs lately .. and I only sat down to do the thing today. And .. I'm not a bit suprised by the outcome. I know, I know - its a test based on MY answers so I shouldn't be surprised ...
Sometimes I wish I was cooler
I did a Mean Girls post last week and mentioned a New Kids on the Block shirt that was (to my knowledge) non-existant. Well once again the shopping fanatics have proven me wrong and when I logged in yesterday there was a gift waiting for me.
JellyBean gave me a NKOTB shirt at a place called illuminare (I think I spelled it wrong but the link is a SLURL anyway). Chelle Moore was on a mad hunt for one - THANKS YOU!!! I could SLdie happy now. Seems, though, that my mention of such a dorky thing that I enjoy to which I can only laugh. Honestly I had no idea that anyone shares any of my 'eccentric' likes of anything. I have been proven wrong.
Keith and I were at the pub last week when Step by Step came on the TV and I started singing along .. much to his embarassment .... but the waitress laughed and when I went to the bar for a cappuccino she admitted to singing it too only not as boisterously as I was.
This of course calls for a Song of the Day by none other than New Kids on the Block. Oh and I was really sad that JORDAN was the guy in the middle :( Joey McIntire was *mine* once upon a time when my girlfriends and I each chose a NKOTB guy to be 'ours'.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Flickr is too thorough!
Alright so for those interested I uploaded a few more pics to Flickr. I had fun with that whole 'map' thing for a while but now it wants you to zoom in more to drop the pics ... ugh I can't remember streets we took the pics on - is just the town not good enough for you, flickr?!
Anyway - so I put up our London pics (some of them) and a few others from Norwich that I forgot to post last time. Keith is STILL editing that footage and its a gorgeous day out. Kinda didn't want to be in the house today since we were inside yesterday but what can ya do?
Nothing else to really update with other than a song of the day ...
Can't Stop Moving by Sonny Jim --- this song makes me feel all happy inside.
Anyway - so I put up our London pics (some of them) and a few others from Norwich that I forgot to post last time. Keith is STILL editing that footage and its a gorgeous day out. Kinda didn't want to be in the house today since we were inside yesterday but what can ya do?
Nothing else to really update with other than a song of the day ...
Can't Stop Moving by Sonny Jim --- this song makes me feel all happy inside.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Inebriated Hilarity
So I picked up a couple bottles of wine. Keith said he wasn't a wine fan - but I grabbed some white zinfandel and said "Weeee!" He likes it, he likes it!
Alright so the Andre (pink champagne) was cheap and we picked up a couple bottles of that, too. We're bargain shoppers what can I say?!
He's editing the video that we filmed earlier - and I'm sitting here reading blogs and drinking wine - which was relaxing about an hour ago ... but now I'm pretty much drunk. So now I take random breaks to entertain myself ... luckily the laptop has a built in camera.
Even though the quality isn't so great - the pictures themselves crack me up ... except for one and its kinda scary - but still funny in some weird way.
Oh and Keith is drinking wine too! I wanted wine glasses so he bought me some a couple weeks ago. Wine isn't quite the same without a wine glass. Maybe I was just prissy at the moment. I think now that Keith likes wine enough that we'll actually put our wine glasses to use! Wine is soooo good with seafood (of any kind!)
Anyway I took a bunch of random pics with the webcam on my laptop -- and I thought I'd post em. Why the hell not?!
Nail Polish feels like happy
Most know that it doesn't take a whole lot to make me happy. Ice cream makes me skip, and wild colored nail polish makes me sing.
I took Keith to his class the other night and decided that I needed some loud purple nail polish. My nails is the only 'girly' thing I do. I will spend money on a manicure before I buy myself new underwear or shoes. Its just my 'thing'. Anyway - I haven't owned any good, bright, or colorful nail polish since I moved to be with Keith. I keep forgetting that HE'S the one in the military - not me - so I don't have to conform to their rules. I don't have to keep my hair a certail length .. I don't have to dye my hair 'natural colors' only .. and I certainly can wear any color of nail polish I want! So I did!
I had forgotten how hard it was to paint my left hand (I'm right handed) and needless to say I made a bit of a mess on my fingers - but its the overall effect I was going for. Looking at my hands makes me go "WEEE!" so mission accomplished.
While I was out I also picked myself up some perfume. Seems every time Keith and I go to the BX I have to make a detour at the perfume rack and smell all kinds of perfumes. Most of them I don't like .. but I did find some that gave me a happy feeling inside when I smelled it. Keith said it smelled like cotton candy - which is probably why I like it so much ... but I bought a bottle. I later found out that it was 'made by' Britney Spears (its called Fantasy) but y'know if she ran around smelling like cotton candy maybe she'd be a happier person!
Today Keith decided to put a video idea into motion and started filming .. I was kinda BOOOOO about it because it was a REALLY pretty day .. and its going to start getting nippy here soon.
So Oct 13 or 14 he and I are going to the UK Machinima Festival since they are showing one of our videos .. and on Oct 26th we'll be giving a lecture in Southampton so we have a lot going on next month!
Proof that we do stuff
I was gonna do a song of the day - but I'll save it for a later post :)
I took Keith to his class the other night and decided that I needed some loud purple nail polish. My nails is the only 'girly' thing I do. I will spend money on a manicure before I buy myself new underwear or shoes. Its just my 'thing'. Anyway - I haven't owned any good, bright, or colorful nail polish since I moved to be with Keith. I keep forgetting that HE'S the one in the military - not me - so I don't have to conform to their rules. I don't have to keep my hair a certail length .. I don't have to dye my hair 'natural colors' only .. and I certainly can wear any color of nail polish I want! So I did!
I had forgotten how hard it was to paint my left hand (I'm right handed) and needless to say I made a bit of a mess on my fingers - but its the overall effect I was going for. Looking at my hands makes me go "WEEE!" so mission accomplished.
While I was out I also picked myself up some perfume. Seems every time Keith and I go to the BX I have to make a detour at the perfume rack and smell all kinds of perfumes. Most of them I don't like .. but I did find some that gave me a happy feeling inside when I smelled it. Keith said it smelled like cotton candy - which is probably why I like it so much ... but I bought a bottle. I later found out that it was 'made by' Britney Spears (its called Fantasy) but y'know if she ran around smelling like cotton candy maybe she'd be a happier person!
Today Keith decided to put a video idea into motion and started filming .. I was kinda BOOOOO about it because it was a REALLY pretty day .. and its going to start getting nippy here soon.
So Oct 13 or 14 he and I are going to the UK Machinima Festival since they are showing one of our videos .. and on Oct 26th we'll be giving a lecture in Southampton so we have a lot going on next month!
Proof that we do stuffI was gonna do a song of the day - but I'll save it for a later post :)
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Quite a lot to talk about
As the title says I've got quite a lot to talk about. One subject mostly, but still quite a lot nonetheless.
Keith was scheduled to give a short e-lecture on October 26 but plans have changed. Now we are going to Southampton to give a lecture in person at University of Kent on the subject of film and machinima. We're both really excited as we see this as a wonderful opportunity to show who diverse Second Life is for filming.
Movies are expensive - everyone knows that. The staff it takes to run a film set is almost staggering and each of those people have to be paid. Filming in virtual platforms can narrow the staff down to just ONE person - on top of the set(s) being able to change according to your mood. You haven't got to worry about actors breaking character or anything of that sort - not to mention you can collaborate with people from all over the world to share your vision!
I'm fully aware that I'm not the film/editing Guru that Keith is - but I bring just as much to the table as he does and pick up in areas that he's weak. He may have named his 'company' back in Highschool but the company didn't come to light until 2005 when he and I started the ball rolling. Natural Selection Studios is anything BUT a solo effort. Never has it been just one or the other.
On October 26 (we'll be leaving on the 25th and coming back the 27th) we'll give our hour long lecture as well as taking questions to a crowd of film students as well as metaversal enthusiasts. I'm really curious to see the diversity of interests, but I'm most happy about our efforts being taken seriously.
For a long while now many companies have been open enough to see Second Life for what it is - though many have fallen by the wayside. American Apparel pulled out because sales were bombing ... but what can you expect? You aren't going to make a fraction of the cost off a shirt in SL when you could sell the same one IRL and make double the profit. I somehow feel that some companies were misinformed.
Do I feel I'm tooting my own horn? Not really. NSS has never really catered to RL companies. We've never pitched an idea to a 'real' company - and have never attempted to bring a company or organization into SL. We do what we do because we love it - not because of anything else. Yes I use videos as a means of extra income - but we ALWAYS use the money we make from videos to better our equipment in order to make BETTER videos. We're in the process of saving up to buy me a new computer so that I don't have to use Keith's.
I get a lot of people asking me to teach them how to film/edit - and I always turn them down. On the shallow end there is the common sense of: If I told everyone how to do what I do the way I do it - I'd never profit. But on the deeper end is the fact that if you go back and watch some of our earlier flicks you will see that visually - they are terrible. Both Keith and I have greatly improved over the past two and a half years and I feel that sort of experience should be had by anyone trying out anything new. You have to be bad before you can become good. That's just how it is! I can't teach anyone how to learn - does that make sense? Experimentation is key in anything you're trying to learn .. and that kind of thing can't be taught.
I do plan to film our lecture in October - but I'm not sure if we'll "air" it or if we'll just keep it as a momento for ourselves. I don't see any reason in over-saturating the machinima public and be all "Look at US! We have some credibility!" like SOME people do. At any rate - you won't see any advertising diarrhea from me. I'm sure I'll do a blog post at/after the lecture to highlight a few moments - but that's not the same as force-feeding anyone.
On a different note: I need to get more pics uploaded to Flickr. Keith uploaded a lot to his today - but I still haven't updated mine. I know, I suck.
SONG OF THE DAY
I TOTALLY love this song. And after being kinda "blah" for a few days - this song really gets me dancing around the house like a complete idiot ... but at least Keith thinks its cute!
I Need to Feel Loved by Reflekt
Keith was scheduled to give a short e-lecture on October 26 but plans have changed. Now we are going to Southampton to give a lecture in person at University of Kent on the subject of film and machinima. We're both really excited as we see this as a wonderful opportunity to show who diverse Second Life is for filming.
Movies are expensive - everyone knows that. The staff it takes to run a film set is almost staggering and each of those people have to be paid. Filming in virtual platforms can narrow the staff down to just ONE person - on top of the set(s) being able to change according to your mood. You haven't got to worry about actors breaking character or anything of that sort - not to mention you can collaborate with people from all over the world to share your vision!
I'm fully aware that I'm not the film/editing Guru that Keith is - but I bring just as much to the table as he does and pick up in areas that he's weak. He may have named his 'company' back in Highschool but the company didn't come to light until 2005 when he and I started the ball rolling. Natural Selection Studios is anything BUT a solo effort. Never has it been just one or the other.
On October 26 (we'll be leaving on the 25th and coming back the 27th) we'll give our hour long lecture as well as taking questions to a crowd of film students as well as metaversal enthusiasts. I'm really curious to see the diversity of interests, but I'm most happy about our efforts being taken seriously.
For a long while now many companies have been open enough to see Second Life for what it is - though many have fallen by the wayside. American Apparel pulled out because sales were bombing ... but what can you expect? You aren't going to make a fraction of the cost off a shirt in SL when you could sell the same one IRL and make double the profit. I somehow feel that some companies were misinformed.
Do I feel I'm tooting my own horn? Not really. NSS has never really catered to RL companies. We've never pitched an idea to a 'real' company - and have never attempted to bring a company or organization into SL. We do what we do because we love it - not because of anything else. Yes I use videos as a means of extra income - but we ALWAYS use the money we make from videos to better our equipment in order to make BETTER videos. We're in the process of saving up to buy me a new computer so that I don't have to use Keith's.
I get a lot of people asking me to teach them how to film/edit - and I always turn them down. On the shallow end there is the common sense of: If I told everyone how to do what I do the way I do it - I'd never profit. But on the deeper end is the fact that if you go back and watch some of our earlier flicks you will see that visually - they are terrible. Both Keith and I have greatly improved over the past two and a half years and I feel that sort of experience should be had by anyone trying out anything new. You have to be bad before you can become good. That's just how it is! I can't teach anyone how to learn - does that make sense? Experimentation is key in anything you're trying to learn .. and that kind of thing can't be taught.
I do plan to film our lecture in October - but I'm not sure if we'll "air" it or if we'll just keep it as a momento for ourselves. I don't see any reason in over-saturating the machinima public and be all "Look at US! We have some credibility!" like SOME people do. At any rate - you won't see any advertising diarrhea from me. I'm sure I'll do a blog post at/after the lecture to highlight a few moments - but that's not the same as force-feeding anyone.
On a different note: I need to get more pics uploaded to Flickr. Keith uploaded a lot to his today - but I still haven't updated mine. I know, I suck.
SONG OF THE DAY
I TOTALLY love this song. And after being kinda "blah" for a few days - this song really gets me dancing around the house like a complete idiot ... but at least Keith thinks its cute!
I Need to Feel Loved by Reflekt
Come and touch me baby
I need to feel loved
Come hold me babe
I need to feel loved
I need to feel loved
Come and catch a fire
Don't let me fade away
Come and catch a fire babe
Don't let me fade away
Come and catch a feeling, it's electrifying me
With eyes wide open, I'm dreaming
Breathe for me baby, awake before I'm down
Come and free me baby, awake before I'm down
Come and touch me baby
I need to be loved
Come and hold me babe
I need to feel loved
I'm in love
I'm in love
I'm in love
I'm in love, love love
I'm in love
in love in love
I'm in love
I'm in love
Come and touch me baby
I need to be loved
come and hold me baby
I need to feel loved
Need to feel loved
I need to feel loved
I need to feel loved
I'm in love
in love
in love
I'm in love
in love
I'm in love
in love
in love
I'm in love
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Ok MAYBE a pinhole of light
Alright so the other day I was seriously pissy - and though I said I wasn't gonna really go into detail I will just say: My family drives me up the ever-lovin wall.
I've been trying to call them for the better part of 3 weeks and they never take my calls. Its hard enough being 7 hours ahead of them and trying to 'schedule' phone calls - its worse when I get it all orchestrated and they don't even pick up. Just a big downer, I guess.
Couple weddings coming up this month - and spent a few hours today revising Keith's case study for class. He started off well enough but it just went downhill kinda quick. No matter - its all fixed and turned in now.
So I got some bread on the discount shelf from the bakery .. warmed it up .. slapped some hummus, cream cheese, and butter in a plate and sat and ate while insence was burning right when keith got home. It was a nice relaxing snack type of thing while we discussed our days together.
Not entirely sure what to update with. Our Noob Be Gone: Camera Tutorials was dubbed in Italian so that's pretty cool. Bwah I'm hungry after talking about our bedroom picnic!
I've been trying to call them for the better part of 3 weeks and they never take my calls. Its hard enough being 7 hours ahead of them and trying to 'schedule' phone calls - its worse when I get it all orchestrated and they don't even pick up. Just a big downer, I guess.
Couple weddings coming up this month - and spent a few hours today revising Keith's case study for class. He started off well enough but it just went downhill kinda quick. No matter - its all fixed and turned in now.
So I got some bread on the discount shelf from the bakery .. warmed it up .. slapped some hummus, cream cheese, and butter in a plate and sat and ate while insence was burning right when keith got home. It was a nice relaxing snack type of thing while we discussed our days together.
Not entirely sure what to update with. Our Noob Be Gone: Camera Tutorials was dubbed in Italian so that's pretty cool. Bwah I'm hungry after talking about our bedroom picnic!
Friday, August 31, 2007
I had an awesome rant posted ....
I had a good long awesome rant posted about how I'm soooo mad but I deleted it. I thought typing it all out and reading it would make it seem insignificant but that didn't work. So instead of leaving it up so that backspace backspace no one has to read that shit if they don't want to.
I am about to lay down. I'm not even going to waste time explaining anything ... or bringing anything to light. Doesn't matter anyway.
I do have to ask though ... do you ever feel like screaming at the top of your lungs and just start throwing random breakable shit? Maybe even throw something through a wall? Gah I don't know just do something loud and destructive? Oh oh wait now is the PERFECT time for a famous quote I hear a lot. What's your problem?!
I am about to lay down. I'm not even going to waste time explaining anything ... or bringing anything to light. Doesn't matter anyway.
I do have to ask though ... do you ever feel like screaming at the top of your lungs and just start throwing random breakable shit? Maybe even throw something through a wall? Gah I don't know just do something loud and destructive? Oh oh wait now is the PERFECT time for a famous quote I hear a lot. What's your problem?!
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Weddings Weddings Everywhere
I've done a pant-load of weddings this month. Okay so Keith actually filmed and/or edited 80% of those - but if he's home and doing nothing why NOT have him do it? At any rate this is my 2nd wedding in two days and oddly I'm totally fine with it.
Lately with the wedding video scene folks have started picking songs I haven't heard - or just haven't already used in a wedding vid which seems to make the editing process go a lot more smoothly. When you have to hear a song you don't like over and over 40 million times it starts to eat at you.
We did a drow wedding this month which was awesome! Finally something totally different than the 'norm'! I only filmed the reception (cuz Keith had to go to work) but still! It was nice to see something different for a change.
Not sure if I've updated about it or not: But I'm renting a plot of land for about 6k a month and when I don't want it I don't have to worry about selling it or anything. Keith kinda didn't get it at first - but now he's cool with it. And its really upped business! Which was my overall goal anyway. Haha! I win!
Staying at home is really starting to wear on me. Even though I try to keep myself busy with videos, scheduling, cleaning, cooking what have you - I still feel really blah. I think its because I don't get any alone time. Yeah yeah I know - I'm home alone while Keith is at work - but that's the only time! I don't even go shopping alone which just the thought seems like a luxury. I love my husband so so much ... and he's so so great ... but there are times I'd like to go to the bookstore and browse books by myself. The two of us go out and do things almost every weekend (unless there's a video scheduled) and I love doing that ... but there are days I want some solitude I guess.
When I'm home alone - I'm still here. The only time I leave this house is when its with Keith. Hell he even takes me to my dentist appointments. I love spending time with him and all that - but like I said there are times I just want to go to the coffee shop and sit and have a cup or two while reading a book or something. I know I could easily do that at home while he's at work - but I think its because I associate home WITH work now. When I'm here and he's at work ... I'm at work too. I spend a lot of time in SL doing marketing and advertising work. I know he doesn't see it as work because for one: He's good at it and two he really likes it --- but for me I have to struggle to do even a fraction of the quality he does. So YES it is work! Anything that you have to really try to do and fret over I would consider work. Anything that you do that you're good at and can do with great ease is a hobby. Natural Selection Studios is a hobby for Keith - but its constant work for me.
Well the wedding I'm filming starts in about 15 minutes so I'd better cut this off. I'll update more later!
Lately with the wedding video scene folks have started picking songs I haven't heard - or just haven't already used in a wedding vid which seems to make the editing process go a lot more smoothly. When you have to hear a song you don't like over and over 40 million times it starts to eat at you.
We did a drow wedding this month which was awesome! Finally something totally different than the 'norm'! I only filmed the reception (cuz Keith had to go to work) but still! It was nice to see something different for a change.
Not sure if I've updated about it or not: But I'm renting a plot of land for about 6k a month and when I don't want it I don't have to worry about selling it or anything. Keith kinda didn't get it at first - but now he's cool with it. And its really upped business! Which was my overall goal anyway. Haha! I win!
Staying at home is really starting to wear on me. Even though I try to keep myself busy with videos, scheduling, cleaning, cooking what have you - I still feel really blah. I think its because I don't get any alone time. Yeah yeah I know - I'm home alone while Keith is at work - but that's the only time! I don't even go shopping alone which just the thought seems like a luxury. I love my husband so so much ... and he's so so great ... but there are times I'd like to go to the bookstore and browse books by myself. The two of us go out and do things almost every weekend (unless there's a video scheduled) and I love doing that ... but there are days I want some solitude I guess.
When I'm home alone - I'm still here. The only time I leave this house is when its with Keith. Hell he even takes me to my dentist appointments. I love spending time with him and all that - but like I said there are times I just want to go to the coffee shop and sit and have a cup or two while reading a book or something. I know I could easily do that at home while he's at work - but I think its because I associate home WITH work now. When I'm here and he's at work ... I'm at work too. I spend a lot of time in SL doing marketing and advertising work. I know he doesn't see it as work because for one: He's good at it and two he really likes it --- but for me I have to struggle to do even a fraction of the quality he does. So YES it is work! Anything that you have to really try to do and fret over I would consider work. Anything that you do that you're good at and can do with great ease is a hobby. Natural Selection Studios is a hobby for Keith - but its constant work for me.
Well the wedding I'm filming starts in about 15 minutes so I'd better cut this off. I'll update more later!
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Serious Case of Neglect
So lately I've really been neglecting my blog - and I feel horrible about it. I hope no one hotlines me for it :( Since my computer died I've been left mourning it and this laptop as nice as it is and as convienent as it is really leaves one for wanting. I get like .5 FPS in Second Life - WoW runs slightly better ... but its really just a pain. While Keith is at work I use his beast of a machine - but when he's home I'm stuck with this contraption. It isn't comfortable to type on either, really. Geeze why am I whining? At least I have something, right?
Keith actually posted a rant on his blog that I totally agree with. Not to mention I've already flown off on a tangent or two about it on my own blog. I'm slowly SLOWLY learning to let things go - even if I do get a twinge of anger over it. I'll narrow my eyes and mumble "Damn. It." but no more random rants where I talk for like 5 minutes and say variations of the word 'fuck' 93849283 times.
Not sure if we're gonna take any kind of trip this weekend or not. I am about to put our London pics on Flickr for those that look at our pics, anyway. I know his family checks my blog and our flickr accounts often so we try to keep everything up to date. My family couldn't be arsed to open a URL to see what I'm up to - so I mostly keep track of everything for my own benefit and for a few friends back in my hometown.
I plan to start shooting a few videos probably next month - all fun and no profit. And y'know I don't care if some hack with Fraps used a song I wanted to use (Jelly knows who I'm talking about)... I'll still use it. Why am I like 'that'? "OMFG they used what I wanted to use ... and now everyone is going to compare A to B because they put theirs out first yet I had the idea I just never got around to it till now. NOW I can't use that song/theme!" Seriously I need to chill.
And I read somewhere that Anne Rice went all 'Born Again Christian' and I think that's the biggest slug to the chest. She wrote the most in depth novels that were both darkly romantic yet chilling ... and now she's "Writing for Jesus Christ". I'm hurt. I don't know what to say.
With that, friends - I will just leave you with a song of the day :) The song is: They Weren't There by Missy Higgins (I love this girl!)
Lyrics:
Keith actually posted a rant on his blog that I totally agree with. Not to mention I've already flown off on a tangent or two about it on my own blog. I'm slowly SLOWLY learning to let things go - even if I do get a twinge of anger over it. I'll narrow my eyes and mumble "Damn. It." but no more random rants where I talk for like 5 minutes and say variations of the word 'fuck' 93849283 times.
Not sure if we're gonna take any kind of trip this weekend or not. I am about to put our London pics on Flickr for those that look at our pics, anyway. I know his family checks my blog and our flickr accounts often so we try to keep everything up to date. My family couldn't be arsed to open a URL to see what I'm up to - so I mostly keep track of everything for my own benefit and for a few friends back in my hometown.
I plan to start shooting a few videos probably next month - all fun and no profit. And y'know I don't care if some hack with Fraps used a song I wanted to use (Jelly knows who I'm talking about)... I'll still use it. Why am I like 'that'? "OMFG they used what I wanted to use ... and now everyone is going to compare A to B because they put theirs out first yet I had the idea I just never got around to it till now. NOW I can't use that song/theme!" Seriously I need to chill.
And I read somewhere that Anne Rice went all 'Born Again Christian' and I think that's the biggest slug to the chest. She wrote the most in depth novels that were both darkly romantic yet chilling ... and now she's "Writing for Jesus Christ". I'm hurt. I don't know what to say.
With that, friends - I will just leave you with a song of the day :) The song is: They Weren't There by Missy Higgins (I love this girl!)
Lyrics:
You breathed infinity into my worldI'm thinking of using it for an Anniversery type Video for Keith in like ... ohhhhh march? lol
And time was lost up in a cloud and in a whirl.
We dug a hole in the cool grey earth and lay there for the night.
Then you said, 'wait for me we'll fly the wind,
We'll grow old and you'll be stronger without him' but oh,
Now my world is at your feet. I was lost and I was found,
But I was alive and now I've drowned.
So now I will be waiting for the world to hear my song
So they can tell me I was wrong...
But they weren't there beneath your stare,
And they weren't stripped 'till they were bare of
Any bindings from the world outside that room.
And they weren't taken by the hand
And led through fields of naked land
Where any pre-conceived ideas were blown away...
So I couldn't say 'no'.
You sighed and I was lost in you, weeks could've past for all I knew.
You were there blanket of the over-world and so I couldn't say,
I wouldn't say 'no'. But they all said, 'you're too young to even know,
Just don't let it grow and you'll be stronger without him'
But oh, now, my world is at your feet. I was lost and I was found,
But I was alive and now I've drowned.
So now I will be waiting for the world to hear my song
So they can tell me I was wrong...
But they weren't there beneath your stare,
And they weren't stripped 'till they were bare
Of any bindings from the world outside that room.
And they weren't taken by the hand and led through fields
Of naked land where any pre-conceived ideas were blown away...
But they weren't there beneath your stare,
And they weren't stripped 'till they were bare
Of any bindings from the world outside that room.
And they weren't taken by the hand and led through fields
Of naked land where any pre-conceived ideas were blown away...
So I couldn't say 'no'.
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Watching isn't as much fun as DOING
Went to the dentist Friday and she filled a small cavity I've had for probably two years but never noticed ... anyway so she's filling up every cavity I have no matter now small. I shouldn't complain .. but its still the dentist! But she's a really nice lady and it isn't painful.
While I was getting shots and drills in my face Keith bought a new game for the 360. They were out of DDR pads so he hasn't gotten ME a game yet (I also want Guitar Hero II but he says they lock up) so yet again 'm stuck sitting here and just watching him play video games.
I kinda took matters into my own hands and have started a Lineage II download. Yeah I could have gone back to WoW but I didn't really want to. I know all the quest lines and crap. I'm sure its going to suck playing on a Laptop but it shouldn't be THAT bad. I mean .. I played WoW on this laptop for months.
I have a wedding to film tonight - another to do tomorrow ... and I decided to just rent a plot of land instead of buying the one next to "the one that used to be next to Jelly". I didn't want to be stuck with land if I wanted to sell - so I thought renting would be the best way to go. keith was sitll all 'WTF" about it but meh. Its really cut out a lot of time that I WAS spending in Second Life - and at the same time notecards are still getting distributed. So the moral is: I Win.
So I'm anxiously waiting for Lineage II to download since I haven't had a game I enjoy playing for the last 4 months or so. I quit WoW for CoH/CoV cuz Keith didn't want to pay for both -- but then I quit CoH/CoV cuz I didn't like it. And if I dont' like Lineage I'll just go back to EverQuest or something. What can I say? I'm a dork for MMORPGs [shrug]
While I was getting shots and drills in my face Keith bought a new game for the 360. They were out of DDR pads so he hasn't gotten ME a game yet (I also want Guitar Hero II but he says they lock up) so yet again 'm stuck sitting here and just watching him play video games.
I kinda took matters into my own hands and have started a Lineage II download. Yeah I could have gone back to WoW but I didn't really want to. I know all the quest lines and crap. I'm sure its going to suck playing on a Laptop but it shouldn't be THAT bad. I mean .. I played WoW on this laptop for months.
I have a wedding to film tonight - another to do tomorrow ... and I decided to just rent a plot of land instead of buying the one next to "the one that used to be next to Jelly". I didn't want to be stuck with land if I wanted to sell - so I thought renting would be the best way to go. keith was sitll all 'WTF" about it but meh. Its really cut out a lot of time that I WAS spending in Second Life - and at the same time notecards are still getting distributed. So the moral is: I Win.
So I'm anxiously waiting for Lineage II to download since I haven't had a game I enjoy playing for the last 4 months or so. I quit WoW for CoH/CoV cuz Keith didn't want to pay for both -- but then I quit CoH/CoV cuz I didn't like it. And if I dont' like Lineage I'll just go back to EverQuest or something. What can I say? I'm a dork for MMORPGs [shrug]
Sunday, August 12, 2007
WHY OHHHH WHYYY! Oh the HUMANITY!!!!!
Alright so as most know I have been saving up to buy a lil plot of land. I'm up to a little over 9k now (I've started splitting profit from the wedding videos ... Keith doesn't know YET) and have oooh about 30K to go.
I already hate it. I hate not spending any money!! All these designers are putting out shit I want so I just sit .. stare at the pics .. sigh .. then walk away. I've never really been a shopper. I don't even change clothes more than once a week ... but when I want something I normally get it. But now? Now that has been taken from me ... by .. me!
I don't really care if I don't have a new skin, and I don't really care if I don't have new clothes - I could use some new hair - but y'know I doubt if I'd even wear the new hair much. I pretty much just stick with the same few hairstyles honestly.
Alright so I still have a long way to go in order to get any land .. then after that I have to buy a prefab. I was going to buy one a few weeks back - but now I'm glad I didn't after seeing how common it is in SL. HOWEVER: I do still really like that prefab and may still get it anyway. Why shouldn't I? If I changed my hair/clothes every time I saw someone else with the same outfit on I'd never have the same shit on for more than a couple hours at most.
The 'semi downside' to the land I want is that its next door to JellyBean and HawksRock and I really think they'd prefer their privacy - but GOD its such a nice sim! And fairly cheap! And its soooo quiet! So I've really got some thinking to do. I'm sure by the time I save up that 40k that the plot I want will be gone so the 'me being respectful of space' issue won't be an issue ... but the issue will be more of me keeping the reigns tight on myself so that I don't spend what I've saved!!! Its so hard though!
I guess my problem is that I read too many blogs so I see all this shit the designers put out and I go "ooooooh" and "Ahhhhhh" then suddenly I go "Wahhhhhhhh" because i remember that I'm SAVING. It'll all be worth it in the end, right?
Song of the Day
Where'd You Go by Mighty Mighty Bosstones
Keith loves that song ^^
I already hate it. I hate not spending any money!! All these designers are putting out shit I want so I just sit .. stare at the pics .. sigh .. then walk away. I've never really been a shopper. I don't even change clothes more than once a week ... but when I want something I normally get it. But now? Now that has been taken from me ... by .. me!
I don't really care if I don't have a new skin, and I don't really care if I don't have new clothes - I could use some new hair - but y'know I doubt if I'd even wear the new hair much. I pretty much just stick with the same few hairstyles honestly.
Alright so I still have a long way to go in order to get any land .. then after that I have to buy a prefab. I was going to buy one a few weeks back - but now I'm glad I didn't after seeing how common it is in SL. HOWEVER: I do still really like that prefab and may still get it anyway. Why shouldn't I? If I changed my hair/clothes every time I saw someone else with the same outfit on I'd never have the same shit on for more than a couple hours at most.
The 'semi downside' to the land I want is that its next door to JellyBean and HawksRock and I really think they'd prefer their privacy - but GOD its such a nice sim! And fairly cheap! And its soooo quiet! So I've really got some thinking to do. I'm sure by the time I save up that 40k that the plot I want will be gone so the 'me being respectful of space' issue won't be an issue ... but the issue will be more of me keeping the reigns tight on myself so that I don't spend what I've saved!!! Its so hard though!
I guess my problem is that I read too many blogs so I see all this shit the designers put out and I go "ooooooh" and "Ahhhhhh" then suddenly I go "Wahhhhhhhh" because i remember that I'm SAVING. It'll all be worth it in the end, right?
Song of the Day
Where'd You Go by Mighty Mighty Bosstones
Keith loves that song ^^
Friday, August 10, 2007
Fwap!
I love my husband. He happens to be quite attractive (in my eyes anyway) and very romantical. However, he never seems to do what I ask him to do without putting up an argument like a teenager. And .. some days it makes me wanna just thump his nose! I know he does it just to annoy me - but rawgh! Even though I get over it about 15 minutes later it still aggravates me. I can't ask him to do something (like fold laundry) without hearing things like "But YOU always fold it, why do I gotta fold it? If I fold it .. its just gonna be messed up." And that just drives me up the wall! I wonder if its just his way of trying to get out of doing it ... or if its some 'husband' chromosome that activates in all men once they get married. Its probably a combination of both.
I tried really hard to stay on the 6am - 3pm sleep schedule but Keith keeps switching it around. Some days he'll come home at like 8am and stay up until 2pm then want to go to bed .. but I went to bed hours ago and am ready to get up about the time he's winding down. Today he came home from work at about 8am and stayed up until about 9:30pm and is now sound asleep when this is like my normal 'lunch' time.
For once I decided to sit out in the conservatory and brought my laptop out here (since my computer died *emotear*) so that I can sit and type my chubby little fingers off without waking Keith up.
He bought us an Xbox 360 Elite yesterday - but totally skimped on the game. He picked up some 20$ thing that was kinda cute and funny at first but has quickly gotten stale to me. Anyway we've been playing Rayman off and on .. and I pretty much just don't play unless its the music/dancing challenge where its kinda like DDR or Elite Beat Agents. Not only because I like it .. but because Keith doesn't have much rhythm. Its okay though - it works out better that way because I hate the shooting stages.
Due to the death of my computer I haven't logged into SL except to send IMs to those that have scheduled weddings to follow up and make sure there have been no changes to their plans. Other than that I just haven't really been in the mood. Of course I'll log in on Keith's computer when I have to film these weddings but until then I'm just not really gunnin for #1 right now. I'm just chillin.
So yeah sitting out here in the conservatory with a big can of Strongbow (and its NOT a Chav drink outside the city. REALLY!) and some cigarettes that I haven't smoked but probably will here soon. I'm not sure why ... but its just relaxing to me. Keith only likes smoking from the hookah but pfft after a few beers or ciders I don't care! I made some hummus earlier which flopped, actually :( I used a bit too much lemon juice even though I used LESS than what the recipe said to use! Meh trial and error I guess. It wasn't HORRIBLE but it wasn't good either :( I tried!
Keith has been writing a lot on a series, but I still don't know when he'll film it. He's pretty much done it alone. When he's got free time at work (and it happens a LOT) he'll write a page or two of a script. He's had me brainstorm with him on a few occasions but it isn't to get a story down, its more or less to just develop is own so I haven't really played a part in the process. Not that I really mind because I honestly haven't felt up to writing anything lately. I think its just because of putting so much energy into these weddings - but I can't be sure.
OMG I watched like 40 million episodes of Buffy last night and the night before and man I forgot how much I love that show! I really miss it :( I may have to get Keith to buy season DvDs of it. That and Charmed! I loved that show too! It was better after Shannon Doherty died off and was replaced by Rose McGowan IMHO. I think I was just "Brenda'd" out from all my years of watching 90210 as a tween. But yeah - totally good show after her ass was gone.
I know I've totally just rambled through this whole post - but I'm on my way to drunk right now so deal with it! At least I'm spelling pretty well, but even if I weren't it isn't like anyone else would know - that's what that ABC button is for at the top. I win!
So with my computer's death has come the end of my SL Dj'ing for a bit. It makes me kinda sad because I was going to use that DJ money for land in SL in order to slap a prefab on and give myself a little office type thing .. but NooOOooOooo sabotaged. Okay it wasn't REALLY sabotage but that doesn't make me like it any more! It does suck, though. Just when I think I have everything figured out .. FWAP .. some obstacle slaps me in the forehead. Oh well. It'll all get back on track sometime soon.
I still haven't uploaded the London pics to Flickr yet - but I do plan to sometime soon. I don't even think Keith has uploaded them yet. I'll get around to it in the next couple days I'm sure. Right now I really dunno what else I could possible say or even give any kind of update on .. so I'll just back away slowlyyyyy
I tried really hard to stay on the 6am - 3pm sleep schedule but Keith keeps switching it around. Some days he'll come home at like 8am and stay up until 2pm then want to go to bed .. but I went to bed hours ago and am ready to get up about the time he's winding down. Today he came home from work at about 8am and stayed up until about 9:30pm and is now sound asleep when this is like my normal 'lunch' time.
For once I decided to sit out in the conservatory and brought my laptop out here (since my computer died *emotear*) so that I can sit and type my chubby little fingers off without waking Keith up.
He bought us an Xbox 360 Elite yesterday - but totally skimped on the game. He picked up some 20$ thing that was kinda cute and funny at first but has quickly gotten stale to me. Anyway we've been playing Rayman off and on .. and I pretty much just don't play unless its the music/dancing challenge where its kinda like DDR or Elite Beat Agents. Not only because I like it .. but because Keith doesn't have much rhythm. Its okay though - it works out better that way because I hate the shooting stages.
Due to the death of my computer I haven't logged into SL except to send IMs to those that have scheduled weddings to follow up and make sure there have been no changes to their plans. Other than that I just haven't really been in the mood. Of course I'll log in on Keith's computer when I have to film these weddings but until then I'm just not really gunnin for #1 right now. I'm just chillin.
So yeah sitting out here in the conservatory with a big can of Strongbow (and its NOT a Chav drink outside the city. REALLY!) and some cigarettes that I haven't smoked but probably will here soon. I'm not sure why ... but its just relaxing to me. Keith only likes smoking from the hookah but pfft after a few beers or ciders I don't care! I made some hummus earlier which flopped, actually :( I used a bit too much lemon juice even though I used LESS than what the recipe said to use! Meh trial and error I guess. It wasn't HORRIBLE but it wasn't good either :( I tried!
Keith has been writing a lot on a series, but I still don't know when he'll film it. He's pretty much done it alone. When he's got free time at work (and it happens a LOT) he'll write a page or two of a script. He's had me brainstorm with him on a few occasions but it isn't to get a story down, its more or less to just develop is own so I haven't really played a part in the process. Not that I really mind because I honestly haven't felt up to writing anything lately. I think its just because of putting so much energy into these weddings - but I can't be sure.
OMG I watched like 40 million episodes of Buffy last night and the night before and man I forgot how much I love that show! I really miss it :( I may have to get Keith to buy season DvDs of it. That and Charmed! I loved that show too! It was better after Shannon Doherty died off and was replaced by Rose McGowan IMHO. I think I was just "Brenda'd" out from all my years of watching 90210 as a tween. But yeah - totally good show after her ass was gone.
I know I've totally just rambled through this whole post - but I'm on my way to drunk right now so deal with it! At least I'm spelling pretty well, but even if I weren't it isn't like anyone else would know - that's what that ABC button is for at the top. I win!
So with my computer's death has come the end of my SL Dj'ing for a bit. It makes me kinda sad because I was going to use that DJ money for land in SL in order to slap a prefab on and give myself a little office type thing .. but NooOOooOooo sabotaged. Okay it wasn't REALLY sabotage but that doesn't make me like it any more! It does suck, though. Just when I think I have everything figured out .. FWAP .. some obstacle slaps me in the forehead. Oh well. It'll all get back on track sometime soon.
I still haven't uploaded the London pics to Flickr yet - but I do plan to sometime soon. I don't even think Keith has uploaded them yet. I'll get around to it in the next couple days I'm sure. Right now I really dunno what else I could possible say or even give any kind of update on .. so I'll just back away slowlyyyyy
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Flickr
Oh. I forgot that I added that picture slide show badge thingy over there like I said I would the other day. I think there are London pics that I haven't uploaded yet ...
Every month I take pictures off to add new ones (it would be stupid for Keith and I both to pay for premium accounts) so huzzah!
BTW - these are all IRL pictures of Bebop and I so if you aren't interested in our RLs then don't look at it. We aren't naked or anything like that ... but it is us being our goofy selves out in random public places that we go to.
Every month I take pictures off to add new ones (it would be stupid for Keith and I both to pay for premium accounts) so huzzah!
BTW - these are all IRL pictures of Bebop and I so if you aren't interested in our RLs then don't look at it. We aren't naked or anything like that ... but it is us being our goofy selves out in random public places that we go to.
PILLAGE!
Alright .. so my computer took a huge shit. I really think little gnomes snuck in over night and trashed it because .. well .. its just cooler to think of it that way. It was a small group of about 20 that went all John Wallace on my 'puter. Whatever! FREEDOM! Ffs. So yes, its toast.
Thankfully last year Keith and I bought this laptop to tide me over until we could make it to Missouri in order to gather the rest of my crappy belongings otherwise we'd be fighting over who's turn it is.
The upside is now we get to build MY computer .. the downside is that I have to wait until he goes to work to use his .. or just use this laptop. Luckily all the weddings I've booked are scheduled for when he's at work so there's no problem there.
He did however receive an e-mail from a 'fan' that is now offering wedding videos in SL. Okay so fans emulate that/those which they are a fan of. That's nothing new - but the fact that she was all like "Bebop Vox is my most favorite person ever -- but this is for those just wishing to capture a simple memory" .. Wow there's so much shit I want to say but I'll just leave it be. He keeps telling me things like "Who cares?! Let 'em do whatever they want. We have almost three years of a reputation behind us - they can't hold a candle to that." And he's right. I really need to stop being so competitive over this kinda thing.
I guess since I work so hard on everything that I just see it as a slap to the face. Not only what she said - but how she's gone about it. She's gone from being a mere fan, to making her own laggy ass videos, to now mimicking the business that he and I have spent three years building from nothing. Makes me wanna pillage! But, I have to be civil because as everyone knows there will come competition in any business - and you just have to rely on your own quality of work to bring you out ahead. And though I have complete and TOTAL faith in both his work and my own - it still grinds my gears. I'm petty like that, I guess?
The machinima thing has been a full time job for me for almost two years now. I'm constantly working, networking, researching, experimenting ... and Keith does too (though he's far more efficient with it) and it just makes me want to slap someone sometimes when my toes get stepped on is all. Of course I never do - but that doesn't mean I don't think about it!
I remember a time when all the designers used to feel the same way. They'd get all pissy when someone released an outfit similar to theirs etc and it kinda bothers me that I'm doing the same thing ... but at the same time my overly competitive nature won't let me just 'let it go' but I'm really trying this time. I know for a fact that my SL business is secure, but that doesn't mean that I'M secure, does that make sense?
It took over a year to convince folks "Hey Bebop isn't EVERYTHING" and to allow me to film or edit their wedding videos. I actually had to edit them secretly then let HIM break the news to them before I got any form of 'cred' on the machinima circuit. Even though I stood on my soapbox for MONTHS shouting "I am NOT riding his shirt tails, people!" it didn't matter. Now that I've established myself as a director, editor etc - this 'new kid' has really just rubbed me the wrong way. In a way it makes me want to bust my ass double time in order just to say "Nyah nyah" but I know that's immature. Why do I have to be so immature!?!
Alright so I'm just going to keep doing what I always do - which is just be a bit bitchy about it, then slowly rebuild my self esteem even if it may be for the wrong reasons. Spite is a powerful thing, my friends!
What I'd Really Like to Say:
I'll say it again tho (and I know she doesn't read my blog but ..) people pay for our service for a reason. We don't shoot bad angles. We don't have laggy footage (oh god we'd better not after all the money we spent on Keith's computer) and we don't use noob transitions. We pay for our software, and we're cinematic. We have never just slapped footage together and said "There you go! That's your video" (with the exception of JellyBean's wedding back in like 05 - we were noobs) and I really need to stop worrying so much about those that do.
Having FRAPS, Windows Movie Maker and some spare time doesn't mean you're BAMF. Sure, you can compete all you want to - and even though it bothers me - I welcome it. No I'm not a total bitch and I've even mentored a few people so as to make their videos better --- BUT --- none of those people whom I've helped have stepped on my toes as far as wedding videos in SL. Maybe I'm just too damn protective? I'm really not sure.
I have 4 weddings in the next 7 days. Not to mention there are some already booked for September. And damn I still feel bad at directing this ENTIRE post to that ONE girl who will probably NEVER see this - but I really want to get it 'out there' and Keith wont' let me talk to her to do it. He thinks its stupid and that I should just laugh at her while I cash out Lindens. I probably should - but damn! DAMN!
/What I'd Really Like to Say
Okay - I guess I'll go play Neopets or something in order to cheer myself up by looking at cute cartoon animal things and while playing games aimed at adolescents that I still can't beat :( I suck.
Song of the Day
Go to Hell by Milk Inc
Thankfully last year Keith and I bought this laptop to tide me over until we could make it to Missouri in order to gather the rest of my crappy belongings otherwise we'd be fighting over who's turn it is.
The upside is now we get to build MY computer .. the downside is that I have to wait until he goes to work to use his .. or just use this laptop. Luckily all the weddings I've booked are scheduled for when he's at work so there's no problem there.
He did however receive an e-mail from a 'fan' that is now offering wedding videos in SL. Okay so fans emulate that/those which they are a fan of. That's nothing new - but the fact that she was all like "Bebop Vox is my most favorite person ever -- but this is for those just wishing to capture a simple memory" .. Wow there's so much shit I want to say but I'll just leave it be. He keeps telling me things like "Who cares?! Let 'em do whatever they want. We have almost three years of a reputation behind us - they can't hold a candle to that." And he's right. I really need to stop being so competitive over this kinda thing.
I guess since I work so hard on everything that I just see it as a slap to the face. Not only what she said - but how she's gone about it. She's gone from being a mere fan, to making her own laggy ass videos, to now mimicking the business that he and I have spent three years building from nothing. Makes me wanna pillage! But, I have to be civil because as everyone knows there will come competition in any business - and you just have to rely on your own quality of work to bring you out ahead. And though I have complete and TOTAL faith in both his work and my own - it still grinds my gears. I'm petty like that, I guess?
The machinima thing has been a full time job for me for almost two years now. I'm constantly working, networking, researching, experimenting ... and Keith does too (though he's far more efficient with it) and it just makes me want to slap someone sometimes when my toes get stepped on is all. Of course I never do - but that doesn't mean I don't think about it!
I remember a time when all the designers used to feel the same way. They'd get all pissy when someone released an outfit similar to theirs etc and it kinda bothers me that I'm doing the same thing ... but at the same time my overly competitive nature won't let me just 'let it go' but I'm really trying this time. I know for a fact that my SL business is secure, but that doesn't mean that I'M secure, does that make sense?
It took over a year to convince folks "Hey Bebop isn't EVERYTHING" and to allow me to film or edit their wedding videos. I actually had to edit them secretly then let HIM break the news to them before I got any form of 'cred' on the machinima circuit. Even though I stood on my soapbox for MONTHS shouting "I am NOT riding his shirt tails, people!" it didn't matter. Now that I've established myself as a director, editor etc - this 'new kid' has really just rubbed me the wrong way. In a way it makes me want to bust my ass double time in order just to say "Nyah nyah" but I know that's immature. Why do I have to be so immature!?!
Alright so I'm just going to keep doing what I always do - which is just be a bit bitchy about it, then slowly rebuild my self esteem even if it may be for the wrong reasons. Spite is a powerful thing, my friends!
What I'd Really Like to Say:
I'll say it again tho (and I know she doesn't read my blog but ..) people pay for our service for a reason. We don't shoot bad angles. We don't have laggy footage (oh god we'd better not after all the money we spent on Keith's computer) and we don't use noob transitions. We pay for our software, and we're cinematic. We have never just slapped footage together and said "There you go! That's your video" (with the exception of JellyBean's wedding back in like 05 - we were noobs) and I really need to stop worrying so much about those that do.
Having FRAPS, Windows Movie Maker and some spare time doesn't mean you're BAMF. Sure, you can compete all you want to - and even though it bothers me - I welcome it. No I'm not a total bitch and I've even mentored a few people so as to make their videos better --- BUT --- none of those people whom I've helped have stepped on my toes as far as wedding videos in SL. Maybe I'm just too damn protective? I'm really not sure.
I have 4 weddings in the next 7 days. Not to mention there are some already booked for September. And damn I still feel bad at directing this ENTIRE post to that ONE girl who will probably NEVER see this - but I really want to get it 'out there' and Keith wont' let me talk to her to do it. He thinks its stupid and that I should just laugh at her while I cash out Lindens. I probably should - but damn! DAMN!
/What I'd Really Like to Say
Okay - I guess I'll go play Neopets or something in order to cheer myself up by looking at cute cartoon animal things and while playing games aimed at adolescents that I still can't beat :( I suck.
Song of the Day
Go to Hell by Milk Inc
Sunday, August 05, 2007
Weekend Trip and other Things
So for the first time in a couple weeks Keith and I decided to take a weekend trip. We don't stay gone all weekend, but we take a full day and go do stuff. Saturday we spent the entire day in London just wandering aimlessly and stopping of anywhere for a pint. We didn't want to be tourists, but we did just want to be somewhere unfamiliar in order to just relax. Unfortunately it was a VERY nice day out so the tourists were in full force. Maybe I'm weird - but hearing so many languages at once gives me a headache :(
So the entire river front was crawling with tourists, and we did the tourist thing of taking a boat down the river and back. And it was really relaxing! Of course it was crowded with tourists taking pictures of every single thing possible and yelling things which I assumed to be "No turn that way! Can't you smile?!" etc.
I got myself a bit of a sunburn (I'm very fair skinned. I blame by Irish ginger-haired parents) which is a bit achy today. It was worth it though. It actually didn't rain in London! We of course took along an umbrella anyway - but we didn't need it! We took the tube from Redbridge to St Paul after it took us about fifteen minutes to find the damn car park there at Redbridge :( We found it, though!
We haven't yet taken the pictures off the digital camera, but I remembered that we both have Flikr accounts, and I have yet to really share our pictures from both Chicago and all over England. I've been in the process of putting together a DvD for my family to mail to them so they can see our pictures also, but with all the weddings I've been doing in SL I haven't really had the time to sit down and work on it. Soon though, I hope. I've only got 4 weddings to do this month so far so I'll find time in the next couple weeks I'd say.
So yeah I'm going to add both mine and Keith's Flikr Tikr (haha I'm clever) to the side over there somewhere ------------------------------------------------------------------------>
Song of the Day
Falling by Emmy Rossum (she reminds me of Imogen Heap which is GOOD!)
So the entire river front was crawling with tourists, and we did the tourist thing of taking a boat down the river and back. And it was really relaxing! Of course it was crowded with tourists taking pictures of every single thing possible and yelling things which I assumed to be "No turn that way! Can't you smile?!" etc.
I got myself a bit of a sunburn (I'm very fair skinned. I blame by Irish ginger-haired parents) which is a bit achy today. It was worth it though. It actually didn't rain in London! We of course took along an umbrella anyway - but we didn't need it! We took the tube from Redbridge to St Paul after it took us about fifteen minutes to find the damn car park there at Redbridge :( We found it, though!
We haven't yet taken the pictures off the digital camera, but I remembered that we both have Flikr accounts, and I have yet to really share our pictures from both Chicago and all over England. I've been in the process of putting together a DvD for my family to mail to them so they can see our pictures also, but with all the weddings I've been doing in SL I haven't really had the time to sit down and work on it. Soon though, I hope. I've only got 4 weddings to do this month so far so I'll find time in the next couple weeks I'd say.
So yeah I'm going to add both mine and Keith's Flikr Tikr (haha I'm clever) to the side over there somewhere ------------------------------------------------------------------------>
Song of the Day
Falling by Emmy Rossum (she reminds me of Imogen Heap which is GOOD!)
Thursday, August 02, 2007
Busy Busy Busy!
Alright so after a long long abscense from DJing in SL (it seemed for a while there that anyone with a few MP3s and SAM called themselves a DJ) I've decided its time to take it up again. I know, I'm a bit mad for doing so - but in my downtime its a nice thing to do for entertainment value. I have rather missed talking to random people and doing my 'so last year' break dances while everyone else twirls around like a drunken ballerina with their Sine Wave dances.
I DJd tonight for a few hours, and it was quite fun. I can't even recall what I played, but it was a wide range of things and if the music didn't keep them entertained the stupid stories I told did. And if they were faking it and typing all those LOLs for no reason .. well .. that's SLife isn't it?
Xaria Concord, Striker Wolfe and I dancin' at Club Cheeky
Last night my old friend Striker even made an appearance by map stalking me lol I don't know why I never see him log in, but he always just pops in. I think LL doesn't want me to know he's online until he shows up. And it never fails - when I see his avatar it says "Striker Wolfe has come online" and I'm left saying ... WHEN?!
I debated REALLY hard over getting some land to slap a prefab on so that I had a place to talk to people who were wanting wedding videos - but Keith cut me off at the pass rather quickly. I can see his point though, but he still isn't making things any easier for me which made me slightly grumpy. I saw it as - I work just as hard for that money (if not more so) so why can't I have a say in things? I do agree that forking over 150 USD for a 4xxx sq m plot does kind act like a punch to the throat .. ah well. Maybe he'd change his mind if I said "Fine you deal with these people and YOU do all the scheduling and YOU answer all the questions .. all from an IM box. Oh and tell them how to change their video URLs on their land so they can see examples of our work ..." and it just goes on and on. Fortunately for him I'm not a mean bitch of a wife and just left it be. He said no, so I'll just leave it be. As I said, perhaps he'll change his mind sometime in the future.
Yesterday I thought I had wanted a new skin and I saw a girl with a great skin on and asked her if she had a LM. She did and I went .. and sadly the skins look horrible on my avatar. Rosie might have gotten one, I'm not sure - but they looked good on her too but they just didn't work for me. Anyway here's the SLurl for anyone interested. Its called Lovey's Boutique and the skins are really pretty but they aren't for everyone. GET DEMOS!
Song of the day:
I DJd tonight for a few hours, and it was quite fun. I can't even recall what I played, but it was a wide range of things and if the music didn't keep them entertained the stupid stories I told did. And if they were faking it and typing all those LOLs for no reason .. well .. that's SLife isn't it?
Xaria Concord, Striker Wolfe and I dancin' at Club CheekyI debated REALLY hard over getting some land to slap a prefab on so that I had a place to talk to people who were wanting wedding videos - but Keith cut me off at the pass rather quickly. I can see his point though, but he still isn't making things any easier for me which made me slightly grumpy. I saw it as - I work just as hard for that money (if not more so) so why can't I have a say in things? I do agree that forking over 150 USD for a 4xxx sq m plot does kind act like a punch to the throat .. ah well. Maybe he'd change his mind if I said "Fine you deal with these people and YOU do all the scheduling and YOU answer all the questions .. all from an IM box. Oh and tell them how to change their video URLs on their land so they can see examples of our work ..." and it just goes on and on. Fortunately for him I'm not a mean bitch of a wife and just left it be. He said no, so I'll just leave it be. As I said, perhaps he'll change his mind sometime in the future.
Yesterday I thought I had wanted a new skin and I saw a girl with a great skin on and asked her if she had a LM. She did and I went .. and sadly the skins look horrible on my avatar. Rosie might have gotten one, I'm not sure - but they looked good on her too but they just didn't work for me. Anyway here's the SLurl for anyone interested. Its called Lovey's Boutique and the skins are really pretty but they aren't for everyone. GET DEMOS!
Song of the day:
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