So Long to SL Machinima/My Old YouTube Account

As most everyone knows or has noticed - I haven't done videos in SL in well over a year now. I used to get a kick out of making videos and stretching my editing muscles, but those days are over.

It started with filming peoples' weddings, then moved on to other projects - but I no longer have interest in such things. As a matter of fact, SL itself has pretty much served its purpose for me. Will I be leaving SL? Hell I only log in now to talk to friends every now and then as it is.

About 7 months ago some random person I don't even know had posted a video response to an old video of mine. Before allowing it as a response I viewed their video and wasn't too impressed. I understand that with hobbies and even real work that when you start out you're no good. I mean hell, Keith and I weren't that great when we started out either. He had video editing knowledge but unfortunately SL lacked the ability to give us the results we wanted. Anyway - I am off track.

So this person's video was of them dancing in a single animated loop for about 5 minutes to a song. Typical youtube video on most accounts, really. Since I didn't feel their video was an actual response to me - I didn't allow it to be marked as a video response. They took it upon themselves to say something like "All I was doing was showing you how much better these new dances are compared to the ones you showed". Fine. Still, it wasn't what I would consider an actual video response.

Over the course of a few weeks (about 3) all their friends were sending me nasty messages on YouTube which I chose to ignore. I had critiqued their video after being harassed saying "Hey next time try putting in some transitions or at least do more than one animation" - which I find to be a very NICE critique considering the content. Apparently giving anyone your opinion when there is room for improvement is a bad thing and this should never be done.

The nasty messages on YouTube continued until I decided to not allow comments, replies or ratings and put a big long rant in the description box which ended with : I understand that not allowing comments, ratings, or replies ruins the entire spirit of what YouTube, SecondLife and Machinima is all about - but I refuse to be harassed over something so juvenile. Way to go shebaspyker &co. Way to ruin it for everyone.

Today I logged into SL to talk to my RL friend Stef and recieved an offline saying (and I'm paraphrasing):
Your little rant on YouTube has really upset my girl Sheba. She doesn't dictate me or tell me who to go off on or anything like that. I don't know who has been contacting you and caused you to go off on this rant - and I don't know the laws in the UK but in the US you can be sued for slander for publishing comments about someone. I'm contacting YouTube and they'll probably delete your account.

I was going to respond to this .. um .. guy (I'm being way too nice) but decided to just put him on ignore. After sitting and thinking about it a while I decided to just delete my YouTube account myself. There are lots of reasons I did it - their harassment not really ranking very high - but if it'll save me a few minutes of telling strangers to "go back to your Gorean RP and stop being so butthurt over the fact that your friend makes shitty videos" then that's a bonus.

My live has evolved beyond SL. I joined SL as a lost 24 year old looking for an escape from the small town life I was trapped in. I found that escape and I relished it. I lived for it in a lot of ways. I was able to express myself in ways that I couldn't do beyond dying my hair purple and causing everyone in town to stare at me. Then I met Keith.

SL then evolved from fun pasttime to vital means of communication to a way of being physically close to someone when it wasn't actually physically possible. As most know, we're now married (just celebrated our 2yr wedding anniversary in March) and have the means of being actually physically close.

We started making videos in SL as a way to fund trips between Illinois and Missouri and thought it was rather 'cute' that we did so by filming other people's SL weddings. Because of all those weddings we were able to save up money to travel to see each other for 3 years before I made the big move after he had finished Basic Training and had been stationed in Oklahoma. The money we made from those videos allowed me to move to Oklahoma and afford things while we figured out exactly what we were going to do next.

Now that we don't need the money from making videos - we don't make videos. Not only do we not need the money but we also don't need the stress. Getting up at 2am to film a 3 hour wedding then turn around and spend 2 hours editing it to upload it - all for about $40 is just not worth it.

Will I still make videos in SL? Maybe, but it will be a leisure activity. Will I dedicate an entire YouTube channel to it again? No. I already have another YouTube account which I planned to post things like my nail art designs and maybe do some makeup tricks - but I won't do the whole SL thing again. Like I said - SL and SL Machinima have served theirpurpose for me and I think its more than time that the torch be passed to someone else.

I've tried for years to mentor those that were interested in making machinima. I love talking to people who are so eager to learn that I feel that my opinion is actually valued. I really love it when people ask me "How did you do that?!" but I don't feel that SL Machinima is my 'thing' anymore. I guess you could say I've just lost the passion for it.

I blog about SL on TheRev - but I never feel that my opinions on anything are valid. Why? A combination of things. I've been in SL so long that most of the people who are 'respected' or whatever don't even know WTF I talk about when I talk about anything that was 'big' or was going on in SL before like .. 07. I also feel like I'm not in SL or up to speed on things that are going on in SL like I used to be, and therefor have no real business in talking about SL. Some people eat, drink and breathe SL (and I used to be one of them!) but I've just moved on.

So in short - my SL videos that used to be on my YouTube account no longer exist. I deleted everything as a nod to myself that 'Yes, its definitely time to move on. Whatever that was, it isn't you anymore.'

As for my nail art/beauty/health/makeup blog thing - once I get that rolling I'm sure I'll post the info here somewhere.

Oh GOD this is HILARIOUS

Classical Emo = Win

Okay so I hated my parents just as much as the goth kids and punk kids and was looking for a way to just step out of my daily life and declare that I ... I don't know. I hated high school. Anyway!

So I'm a YouTube lurker. I love to check out random videos. Lots don't know - but I am a classically trained singer. Yuh! I can't sing along to radio stuff - but give me some sheet music to Carmen or Les Miserables and I'll rock the house. ANYWAY!!

I've never been a fan of 'commercial radio' even though I do enjoy British radio more than I liked the radio stations in the US in the towns I lived in. Part of it is because I spent all my life in the South which means my choices were Classic Rock (think of hearing nothing but Lynyrd Skynyrd all day), Country (think of hearing Hank Williams, Jr all day) or Soft Rock (Creed and Celine Dion) ... so yeah I hatedddd the radio.

These days YouTube has become my alternative radio. There are sooo many talented people (not just singers but accompanists too!) who do 'covers' of songs that I never liked until I heard the COVER version by some unnamed talent on YouTube.

The following video is an example of that. Some random guy who has a talent for playing by ear (the most piano playing I ever did was pounding out harmony parts to whatever I was singing) and doing covers of songs that I HATED.

So I found a video of his .. and he's playing Helena by My Chemical Romance on piano. Of all instruments I think I'm a sucker for the piano the most. Why? Well there are lots of reasons. For one - maybe its my artsy poetic side .. but the strings and the mechanism is hidden which makes it mysterious. Its like its hiding its guts, I guess. Even though you KNOW what happens inside that lid -- you can only pay attention to the pianist's physical interpretation of what they're playing which makes the instrument sooo appealing to me!

Anyway - here's the video.

Wrestling and its Writers

I blame the fact that I am an 80s kid when it comes to my dorkiness. I fully admit to being a huge dork, and the extent of my dweebtastic self stretches far and wide.

As a kid in the 80s I loved loved LOVED watching wrestling on TV. It was a bonding type of thing between my somewhat psychotic Marine uncle and I. Violence was our link - sad but funny.

I never believed anyone when they said wrestling was scripted. I found it hard to believe that Hulk Hogan's sheer might didn't take down Andre the Giant and that they both knew who was going to win that match before they ever left the dressing room.

Sadly, I've come to terms with this dastardly truth just a few days ago. My uncle Julian isn't around for me to say "Wow dude you were right .." so I'll just consider this blogpost and the following video as a nod to those 'evil' things he said to me long ago. And here I told him he was just trying to steal the twinkle from my childhood. Turns out, he was right.

YouTube - Entertainment of CHAMPIONS!

I'll do a real blog post later --

But I came across this vid and watched it like 10 times in a row and absolutely DIED laughing every time. I don't speak or read Korean - but you don't have to in order to find the entertainment value in this video.

I soooo wanna kareoke right now.

YouTube Celebrities are crap

So I'm really getting over saturated with the lack of fun that I used to find on YouTube. Seems these days its either people uploading content that isn't theirs - or its middle aged balding men complaining about how other people are more popular than they are on the YouTube. SHUT UP! One guy claims to have a full time job for a Fortune 500 company .. yet all he does is bitch and moan about how he wants to do videos for a living. With WHAT talent?! Keep your day job dude.

At any rate - Keith and I have been talking for a year or so now about starting a vlog to accompany our site and blog. Its mostly a 'meet the directors' type of thing and not so much a "Look what we can do" type of thing. There was a point in time that we both kinda hid behind our avatars. Sure we were never afraid to BE ourselves - but there was a time we were worried about SHOWING ourselves. And by us I mean me. I'll just cut to the chase by saying that I feel unattractive and felt that the general public would put more emphasis on my outward apperance rather than my talents and whatever ... but at this point I don't care.

Maybe watching all those middle aged balding men whining and crying about their wishes has brought a new sense of 'me' around. They don't seem to care that they should spend their spare time with their kids instead of making videos -- and the general public on YouTube doesn't seem to make a single comment to that degree so why so I even worry about anyone thinking I'm fat?! PFFT. Bring it, bitches. Seriously.

On a fat note - I do plan to start working out this winter once Keith and I are able to actually put a schedule together. I realize that his work schedule changes at the drop of a hat - but he'll just have to fork out a few extra bucks a week on gas in order to let me get out more. The past couple weeks I have been going out on Saturday or Sunday for a couple hours while he works on videos .. but that's really lame. I should be able to go wherever I want whenever I want to do it. I honestly don't think that a couple bucks in gas money is a lot to spend considering the benefits from it.

He and I got into a little bit of an argument a few weeks back about how regardless of how bad of a tourist I am ... I want to NOT be in the house all the time. He gets to go to work and come home - whereas for me work IS home so its like I'm always at work. He saw my point, but said something to the effect of a waste of gas blah blah blah ... at any rate he's just going to have to stop keeping such a leash on me as far as who's allowed to spend money and who isn't. I always feel like I'm not allowed to buy anything or spend money - but he can do whatever he wants cuz its 'his' money.

Its almost 6:30pm and I'm heating up some water to wash dishes. Once he comes home this weekend ... he'll be working on that video probably non stop again. Oh joy oh rapture! I have a wedding scheduled for Sunday so he'll have to at least take a break for a couple hours while I film and edit that .... and we are in desperate need of groceries. We needed groceries LAST week but I couldn't tear him away from filming and editing in order to get that done. Maybe I'll just do it myself this weekend. We'll see!

Titles are for weenies

While traipsing around YouTube I found an easter egg!

30 MINUTES OF 80s CARTOON INTROS!




So awesome.

I Want to Cast Magic Missle!

Alright so I'm a huge geek. My friends and I play D&D in SL - and even dress in character.

Earlier this video/skit popped into my head and I just have to post it. It cracks me up!